Alcoholic Tosser

Jam Baxter

Alcoholic Tosser By Jam Baxter


I’m a self searching man, at least I thought I was in those days
I’m okay I ‘spose, but still I snort up loads of cocaine
They say it’s down to mistrust, abandonment and self-hate
I stare ’em in the eye and cry to f**k ’em if it felt great
I struggle in myself, place a bubble built around my life
And if I haven’t been a part of nothing in my pounding mind
Then f**k it, I’ll just sit within a grin and pick another time
And distance in to mix the gin and substance in my f**king life
Cuz nothing knows the love inside, feel it but the valve is clocked
p*ssing out the liquids by the thousands to the fountain pots
And none of your umbrellas could resist the muddy pounding drops
With every dripping tear and all the shouting in this house I’ve locked
So try breaking in and see how far your candle burns
It’s pitch black forever in this mountain of abandoned words
Mismatching tenants in a crowded vegetated patch
Staring at the rusty jerrycan again, now take a match

One simple weed smoking alcoholic tosser
One little key opens out your options proper
Stomp on the beat, talk sh*t and down a vodka
Stop living weak, own a house and see the doctor

Until the flames collapse I’m comforting the heat
I know it takes a man to stab a drunkard to his feet
But I’m tired, the crusade of facts has played a random help
But who’s brain is who’s mate, I can’t be arsed to slap myself
It’s never my fault, I’ve come to terms on my denial
It seems to be the only thing to serve my custom of a smile
The grief beneath the sober thing that burns enough to comfort Sid
Before I’m rich and bubbling I’m eating out the f**king bin
So f**k the normal way, with corners I’m just walking straight
f**k a spoon, f**k a knife, I’m all about the fork to face
I’m walking round my awkward mates that weep outside this doorstep
And force stress deep inside a portion of my boring head
I was pulled out with forceps, I didn’t wanna leave the womb
I didn’t wanna see the truth, I didn’t wanna breathe
Cuz it’s a disgusting, mistrusting dustbin we sit f**ked in
Lusting for drug fixes, fixed lost in nothing



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